Fat as a Fact

One of the hardest moments when becoming Fat is the moment other people stop denying it.

When you’re still kind of curvy and cute, people will respond to a self depreciating comment with light hearted denial.

“Oh what are you talking about”, they’ll say in an incredulous voice as they playfully swat your arm. “My goodness, you are beautiful, I would kill for that booty.”

Once you pass curvy and enter the world of “chubby”, people become very uncomfortable when you make self depreciating comments. You might say something like, “Well, that dress probably wouldn’t look quite right on me”, and there’s a moment of panic as they try to deduce whether or not you’re fishing for a compliment or if you already know you’re chubby. “Oh I don’t know,” they might stammer after a moment. “Maybe with just the right jacket.”

But when you pass “chubby” and enter the world of “Fat”, all bets are off. There’s no denying your current state and rather than insult you by denying it, people will instead just address it passively as a fact.

Someone else who is Fat might say something to you like, “There are no clothes for people like us in there.” Your coworker might say something like, “I brought this to you because I accidentally ordered it in a plus size.” While shopping with your parents, they might casually ask if they should pass you a 1x or a 2x.

“A 1x”, you’ll say quietly. And then you’ll swap it for a 2x when they’re not looking.

If you’re like me and work with people who are autistic, a student of yours might admit that they like to hug you in the morning because you are “squishier”.

Things are different now, you see. You can no longer tell yourself that your Fatness might just be some form of body dysmorphia only you see in the mirror. You know now it is something that is seen by everyone. A fact about you as real and concrete as the color of your hair.